Monday, March 22, 2010

Email disclaimer

Annoyed by email disclaimers? Add this to your email footer, and get your own back!
Holden's Disclaimer

IMPORTANT: This email is intended for the use of the individual addressees named above and may contain information that is confidential, privileged, or unsuitable for overly sensitive persons with low self-esteem, no sense of humour, or irrational religious beliefs. If you are not the intended recipient, any dissemination, distribution or copying of this email is not authorized (either explicitly or implicitly) and constitutes an irritating social faux pas. Unless the word auscultation has been used in its correct context somewhere other than in this warning, it does not have any legal or grammatical use and may be ignored. No animals were harmed in the transmission of this email; although the Collie next door is living on borrowed time, let me tell you. Those of you with an overwhelming fear of the unknown will be gratified to learn that there is no hidden message revealed by reading this warning backwards, so just ignore that Alert.

Notice from Microsoft: However, by pouring a complete circle of salt around yourself and your computer you can ensure that no harm befalls you and your pets. If you have received this email in error, please add some nutmeg and egg whites, whisk, and place in a warm oven for 40 minutes.


Jarred said...

Too funny! Where do you find this stuff?

Yewtree said...

It was written by a friend of my dad's. I thought it was recycled internet humour, but it is an original apparently, so maybe I shouldn't have posted it.

Makarios said...

It's been around since at least 2001, actually. That's when I first came across it.

Steve Hayes said...

I like it. I think I'll make my own.